CaT Reviews: Age of Division!
This is the twelfth episode of CaT Reviews!, this time featuring Ben 10 Fan Fiction: Age of Division, as requested by himself because fuck this movie up the asshole. I'm not gonna lie guys, this thing is really, really bad. It's so bad it killed CaT Reviews! for half a year. Turn back now. This is your final warning. ---- The movie begins with Yoponot narrating the creation mythos of Ben 10 Fan Fiction and holy fucking shit already I'm cringing out of my chair. Protip: it's a fucking FAN FICTION WIKI. Trying to present its creation like it was "mystical" and "magical" and really anything than its actual origin of Duncan being bored at his mom's party is super pretentious. For those of you who don't know, here's the definition of "pretentious" from Google: *"Attempting to impress by affecting greater importance, talent, culture, etc., than is actually possessed." Keep that in mind because I'm going to be using this word a lot in this review. God help us all. Moving on, Yopo describes the grand history of...Ben 10 Fan Fiction...and the origin of the war that this movie is based off of. Basically, Roads was assassinated- Yeah, basically. This split BTFF into three primary factions: Scidra, who is just so obviously evil I mean holy shit come on guys *"Sci is shown with huge white tendrils coming out from his back" HOW DOES NOBODY FIGURE THIS OUT?! Ahem, anyways, the second faction is the Edgelords, who were accused by Sci of being the assassins and really didn't like that. Call me biased, but they're like the only faction you can sympathize with. The character of CaT in this movie is ridiculously underpowered compared to the other leaders, the entire Edgelord faction was falsely accused, and they're probably the least morally questionable warring faction overall. The third is the Ultra Singularity who is also obviously fucking evil I mean come on guys Really? *"Ultra is revealed, tall, unnaturally pale skin, red blood eyes, wearing bulky Titanium armor, stretched in a robotic fashion all over his body. He has a titanium helmet with two antennae. He wears a red cape." REALLY? Keep in mind that this is supposed to be a morally ambiguous war movie, but the only ambiguous thing here is how nobody figured out that they were making two of the three main factions so OBVIOUSLY EVIL while they were writing them. ---- Anyways, the narration ends, we get the title, and the movie cuts to Scidra raiding Edgelord territory because evil. *'Dakota:' M'lord Sci? Leaked picture of Dakota irl. Sci commands Dakota to announce their attack and then actually begins the raid. *"Sci steps forward and waves his arms in the air as he begins glowing. He manipulates the CSS of the environment, creating shadow constructs that charge in to assist the army." Okay, I need to get this out of the way right now, since it really bugs me. This movie's version of CSS is basically just fucking magic that does whatever the hell it wants. What the writers fail to realize, however, is that CSS is an acronym for Cascading Style Sheet. For those of you who don't know what that means, it means CSS does NOT change the fundamental functionality of a webpage in any way, shape, or form, it just makes it look different. A more accurate portrayal of "changing the CSS" would just be creating illusions or whatever, and a more accurate "do whatever magic" would be JavaScript or HTML, both of which can be used on the wiki to a certain extent. Sort of a nitpick, I know, but it still bugs me. Anyways, Scidra begins raiding the village, and some of the Edgelords, led by CaT, come in to defend it. For those of you who haven't been keeping track, Sci has weird back tendrils and magic on his side, and CaT has...a grenade launcher. It's like pitching Voldemort against a weaker version of the Demoman from TF2. 10/10 rivalry. Actually, all of Scidra has magic bullshit, and the Edgelords are stuck with relatively modern weaponry. Now, I can appreciate a good old magic vs technology showdown, but when the magic side is really kinda OP like it is here, you're gonna have a hard time justifying any wins the technology side gets. *'Wat': Eat lead, Scidra scum! *barrel of his minigun begins rotating as multiple bullets are fired towards Dyten, whose eyes glow violet and dodges them with blinding speed, appearing like a blur five meters to the left. *'Dyten': Sorry, but I've already had breakfast. My blade, however, is a bit thirsty for your blood! Fucking kill me. So as the battle rages on, Rob and Aaron start arguing, with Rob rather surprisingly not taking on the antagonistic role. Funny, considering how prone he is to backstabbing people. No I will never get over it shut up Anyways, CaT, this movie's representation of me, comes in and breaks up the argument, giving the Edgelords a little pep talk. *'raising an eyebrow:' Fair enough. Don't worry, Edgelords, Scidra will not prevail this day or the next. What am I, Optimus Prime? Who talks like that? A more realistic line of dialogue would be: *'smacking Aaron upside the head:' Talk shit, get hit. Come on guys, we've got some assholes to shove. Primal suddenly runs in, warning them of a massive energy ball heading right towards them. They duck and the ball misses them, which is followed by Aaron being a dick because I guess that's just how Aaron is in this movie. *'grabbing him by the neck:' You almost gave away our position, you fan fetishist! *'angry:' I didn't ask for your opinion, you fanist! Oh yeah, and we get to deal with the fan bullshit too. Great. More bullshit happens, and CaT somehow ends up going over to Clara, this film's version of Tabby, and is really, really pissed at her for some reason. Well, I'm somewhat trepidatious about this, but really, how bad could the dialogue be? *'furious: '''Clara, shut the hell up or I'll shove a grenade down your throat, blast you to pieces and feed you to the Baxbaxwalanuksiwe I keep in the basement! First off, do you even know what a Baxbaxwalanuksiwe is? It's basically an ancient Canadian spirit covered in mouths that eats people. If the Edgelords ACTUALLY HAD one of those, they could just stick it outside, point it at the other factions and say "look, a buffet!" and boom, instant win. Second, I've never felt so personally misrepresented since everyone kept mistaking me for a girl. Which is fairly common actually. You're all dicks. Oh, and Clara's response is "great" too: *'Clara:' You know, I understand why you are the leader of the Edgelords. You are a colossal jerk! The Edgelords are honestly the most sympathetic faction in this movie for some goddamn reason so this doesn't make much sense. Look, this battle goes on for way too long and is honestly not all that interesting except for a few key pieces of dialogue I want to go over. *'Nas:' What the hell is tha-? *device explodes, and Nas is flung backwards, the whole world around him turning black. *'Mattimeo:' A special new kind of CSS. It takes away all the colors from you. It's experimental though. I hope it doesn't affect your eyelids forever! My inner "person who kinda knows CSS" wants to kick whoever wrote this in the throat. *"She turns to look at Rob, who struggles to dislodge the katanas from his body" I covered something similar to this in my Horizons review. It's not the same situation, but it shares the same overall problem: y'all don't know how injuries work and I wouldn't trust any of you with a critically injured person if you were the only other people around within a hundred mile radius. Protip: if you have been stabbed or run through with katanas, DO NOT REMOVE THE BLADE(S). The blades do a decent job of sealing your wounds while they're stuck in your body, but if you pull them out, you leave a massive hole for your sweet sweet life juice to come gushing out of like one of those juice-filled gummies. Point being, leave them in until you get to the ER. You'll be much better off. *'raising his head:' G-glad you h-had a reality ch-check, but... I still h-have two open w-wounds. CASE IN FUCKING POINT *Upon gazing at a discarded katana and Reo, she immediately grabs the weapon and approaches Reo menacingly. JOJO REFERENCES 'INTENSIFY' *'Clara:' Little bro? What is this What the fuck is this Have you ever even seen siblings interact outside of HBO Lifetime movies? Because I don't think you have. Tabby is about as likely to call me "little bro" as I am to call my great grandma "bitch tits". So okay about 50% likely but you get the point. *'calmly:' The Ferocious Feline and his followers, the Edgelords, all in one place. How could I ask for a better gift? Scidra... show them Scillumination! Well, I'll give you this: you got Sci's dialogue on point. *CaT: Don't worry, Rob. While things may seem impossible, we are Edgelords. We can do it. You are doing a terrible job of not just making these guys the default protagonists. ---- We cut to Multitrixes Ravine- Where Nick and Brandon, presumably neutrals, are camping out. They edit a nearby cliff because...reasons...and then get visited by the Admins, which consist of Ulti, Toon, Migbro, and Yopo. If you're wondering why I called Mig "Migbro", you might just be approaching the same level of confusion I was on when I realized Mig says the word "bro" in every other line. My confusion shall never be resolved. Anyways, the admins say Nick and Brandon aren't safe because other users can track them through their edits? I guess? It's not really clear how that's supposed to work. The admins try taking Nick and Brandon to Planet Chaturn which is an actual planet here because whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy ''not, but some sort of teleportation interruption ends up making Ulti, Nick, and Brandon disappear to parts unknown. On Planet Chaturn, the remaining admins and Bat figure that the Ultra singularity used their magic sciency bullshit to kidnap their missing comrades. Toon decides to go chew them out. End of scene. Okay then. ---- We cut to the Bill Cipher house AKA Scidra's HQ, where it's immediately revealed that Scidra kidnapped the missing peeps and intend to either convert them or do something that's never really explained. After that, we see the Ultra Singularity HQ where Ultra is doing generic evil overlord things. Toon comes in and asks what they did with the neutrals, which Ultra replies to with extremely vague bullshit that serves no purpose other than making this scene drag on for even longer. Overall nothing gets accomplished other than terrible exposition so moving on. We cut to the Edgelords HQ where a few members of the Ultra Singularity (Steve, Sixef, and Curtis) are trying to get into the base and kill CaT. I mean capture CaT. I mean I don't know what I mean because the movie flip-flops on what the hell they're actually trying to do there. *'Sixef:' Okay, but there's one more thing we need to know.. The Edgelords keep hordes of ocelots as guards Fucking why *'Sixef:' Yes, but, said ocelots were put in by the Cat, who we dub the Feline, the current leader of the Edgelords due to his love of ocelots specifically. Oh okay Fucking '''why' This makes no goddamn sense. Literally the only reason this would be a thing is because ocelots are a type of cat and CaT is associated with cats. People, you have to strike some sort of balance between references and storytelling, something this move is absolute shit at. Pretty much every reference is cringy as hell because they come out of nowhere and don't serve the story. It's basically just taking a break from the plot to say "Hey! Look at us! We're cool and hip! We know other things exist!". It never feels natural, and it's annoying to read. We cut back to Scidra's HQ, where Echo6 and Reo are talking to Ulti. Sci later joins in. I'm not giving specifics since the conversation can just be summed up as: Ulti: You're evil. Sci: I'm not evil I'm just evil Ulti: Stop being evil Sci: No fak u gooby i do what i want Sci then has Ulti knocked out and taken back to his cell or wherever they're keeping him. Shahzeb (literally who?) runs in and informs Sci that they're under attack by the Edgelords. ---- We cut back to the Edgelord base where the Ultra Singularity guys are still trying to continue their mission. They get caught because they're dumb and Sixef won't shut the fuck up (also nailed Sixef's character here tbh) and start fighting with WaT, Rob, and Clara. The fight ends when CaT steps in. *'CaT:' There's no way I'm going to let you trash this place even more! CaT then proceeds to fire a grenade indoors. I guess it works perfectly since it knocks out all the Ultra Singularity members, apparently without damaging anything. Somehow. Wait no my bad I guess it does damage ''something since this piece of dialogue exists: *'Clara:' You know, this caused more damage to the place than if we- There is literally no mention of any damage other than that. Fucking great. Anyways, they get captured, and CaT says to execute them. I'd criticize this for being overly harsh but I don't give a fuck about any of these characters so honestly I don't care. ---- We cut back to Ultra Citadel to reveal that- surprise surprise- Ultra took Toon hostage because evil. Ultra gets informed that their team members have been captured and orders the army to move out to rescue them. That's it. Next scene. ---- We see the Ultra Singularity members about to be executed when they're saved by the proverbial bell of Yopo and Bat suddenly popping in to visit. CaT and Yopo talk alone, where Yopo says that dark forces are gathering and proceeds to flashback to Mig, Bat, and himself fighting user zombies because fuck it we have zombies now why not. Oh wait my bad they're not "zombies", they're "trolls". Huge difference. One is an overused pop culture gimmick and the other is a stupid reference practically identical to the aforementioned overused pop culture gimmick. Yopo deduces that the trolls are being led, which is quickly proved to be right as... Well... I'm just going to let you read this for yourself. ---- earthquake rocks everyone, and Bat looks up, as the ground separates, dividing Bat and Yopo from Mig slightly, as their cover hill sinks to the abyss. The trolls march up to them, as a giant twelve feet tall user appears, with Yopo standing in front of him to face him. Yopo: You.. You were supposed to be dead. Bat: Who's that? Yopo: This is the awakened Titan, Duncan Crook. roars. ---- ---- Duncan: All I wanted was for you to coexist, share ideas, respect one other and reach perfection. But that was impossible. You're slaughtering one another, being uncaring, ruthless, monstrous. Your existence will no longer be tolerated. ---- So Where do I even start with this? Duncan has returned, leading an army of trolls to destroy everyone because they're being dicks. I just I fucking you know what let's just move on ---- Anyways, CaT just straight-up believes Yopo no questions asked and tells Rob to prepare the Edgelord armies, which includes drawing back the group attacking Scidra. Okay then. ---- We cut to the Edgelord strike force infiltrating the Scidra base. They fight past some goons long enough to find Brandon, Nicholas, and Ulti. Primal frees them and Ulti takes the opportunity to get himself and the two neutrals the hell out of there. Aaron is a dick about this because being a dick is literally his only character trait in the entire movie. The scene ends with backup for Scidra (Reo and Dyten) arriving. ---- We see Ren on a scouting mission from the Ultra Singularity to observe the trolls when he's suddenly attacked by Dakota, who was apparently ordered to do the same thing for Scidra. They fight a bit until Mig comes in and tells them to knock it off and the three begin walking together. The topic of Ulti and the missing neutrals comes up where we get this golden line of dialogue: *'flying above:' The Singularity would never do that, and Toon will find that out himself. *'walking:' Scidra wouldn't do it either. Could it be the Edgelords? Yes. Scidra would never do that. RIP Dakota ????-2016 died not knowing how obviously evil his faction is Anyways they get attacked by trolls and end up getting saved by the arrival of Paper who is in the movie now I guess. ---- We get a scene where Thax is working on a "cure" for the trolls (because trolls = zombies, remember?). Ahmad comes in and tells him to stop working on the cure and start working on weapons because Ultra issued a call to arms. The scene caps off with Creeper almost pressing a self-destruct button on one of the prototype weapons because Creeper is apparently stupid and weapons apparently need self-destructs because potatoes. The end of the scene with Creeper feels super tacked on. It feels like obvious setup for the usage of the self-destruct as a plot device later, which, as I mentioned, is already a stupid ide- What? It never comes up again? In the whole entire movie? MOVING ON APPARENTLY ---- We cut back to Mig's group, now joined by The Edgemaster I mean Paper. Paper exposits on some backstory, and honestly, this whole scene casts a massive light on one of the big problems with the movie. There are a lot of parts in this movie that honestly feel like they work, like they were competently written, and could honestly have some sort of impact on the audience. The problem with this is the one I brought up at the very beginning of the movie. This is the Ben 10 Fan Fiction Wiki. You're trying to get us emotionally invested in a bunch of shitposting and/or completely immature teenagers acting out a serious war story that takes place on a fan fiction wiki. Honestly, even if this movie was a 100% competent war story, I still don't think it could have worked. You're trying to get people to take an inherently silly concept completely seriously without any sort of leeway. I'm not saying silly ideas can't be presented seriously, but you need to have some sort of self-awareness if you want the audience to suspend their disbelief enough to enjoy your story. This movie just dumps the reader out in the cold into a gritty war story based on a goofy-ass fanfiction wiki. If you want an example of a similar concept done in a way that doesn't alienate the audience, I'm gonna suck my own dick here for a second and tell you to look at the BTFF RPG franchise. The games (especially the Spooktober RPG) are in no way shy about dealing with death, violence, gore, drama, or any other dark themes, especially in regards to crafting a story. However, they're also fully aware of the fact that the premise of the franchise (shitposters being sucked into a crappy fanfiction wiki) is silly as hell, and they go out of their way to acknowledge and lampshade this both directly and indirectly. This movie would have benefitted so much if there was even just one character, even just one, who stopped at some point and said "hey, this is kinda dumb/crazy/weird, right?". Granted, it would've felt kind of off and out of place if it was just that single line out of nowhere, but it still would've made the movie a lot more enjoyable to read. As it is, you've completely alienated a massive chunk of your audience by taking yourselves too seriously and giving your readers nothing believable to latch onto. That's the main reason the movie gets mocked so much, and why a majority of people heavily dislike it. You took a silly idea way too seriously and completely butchered any emotional investments the audience could have made to the story in the process. I get that you wanted to write a gritty war story, but you took off with it too far and didn't give a second thought to the idea of so much as looking back. ---- We cut to the Edgelord forces coming across the Ultra Singularity's army. CaT tries to stop the situation from escalating, but Ultra orders his army to kill the Edgelords and take their shit. The two armies start fighting as Yopo and Bat just kind of stand off to the side being useless. ---- We see Ulti, Brandon, and Nick running outside the Scidra fortress. Ulti's teleporter is fried and can't get them very far, so Nick comes up with the idea of making an edit and hoping someone will notice and come find them. It works, as the person who comes to save them is...Toon? Uh, I don't know if you remember, but last time we saw Toon, he was being held hostage by the Ultra singularity. *'Toon': I went to the Ultra Singularity. They were the ones with the best tech, but they captured me. EXACTLY HOW DID YOU GET FREE IT'S NOT EXPLAINED IN THIS SCENE IT'S NOT EXPLAINED IN THE REST OF THE MOVIE HOW DID THIS HAPPEN WHAT We cut to Primal's group running away from Shahzeb, Dyten, and Mattimeo in Scidra's HQ. Aaron does some more bitching because dick and they eventually get teleported out of the situation. Somehow. ---- We cut to Paper's group coming across the battle between the Edgelords and the Ultra Singularity. They spot Yopo and Sixef, and we get this stupid piece of conversation: Yopo: 'You.. Paper.. You're alive... 'Paper: I've always been alive. I just lost faith in this pitiful war. Where's Ulti? Yopo: 'We.. didn't really free him.. teleports Ulti, Brandon and Nicholas in with him, and they appear. 'Ulti: That wouldn't have been necessary. How the hell did Ulti hear what they were saying? They very clearly only teleported in after Paper and Yopo finish talking, so how the fuck does this work? Did you just throw in a "cool" one-liner here without checking to make sure it made sense first? Anyways, the gathered group decides that Ren and Ulti should talk to Ultra to get him to stop attacking the Edgelords, and Paper, Toon, and Dakota will go talk to Sci to get him to stop being obviously evil. Everyone else just sort of stands around I guess. ---- We cut to the rooftops of a building where Aaron and Rob are having...well I'm gonna be honest it might just be the dumbest fucking conversation I've ever read in my life. Aaron: Yes.. I like seeing people fight.. Fight like animals brutally.. Killing for a cause they barely acknowledge anymore... Rob: But this is pointless.. None of this needs to have happened... We needed to head out and fight the trolls... This is bad.. Aaron: Relax, Robby, you were always too dang soft.. Such a little pu- violently: Don't you freaking see it? We are dying out here! Everyone we know is getting slaughtered.. Two things. # Stop using pretentious dialogue and pretentious ellipses. Fuck you. # You unironically used the word "freaking" instead of an actual curse in a gritty war movie. Fuck you. Anyways Rob and Aaron get into a fight and for all intents and purposes I hope they just shoot each other because I don't like anyone in this fucking movie. ---- Toon's group arrives at Sci's HQ and convinces him to stop being a dick long enough to save his own ass. Next scene. ---- Back to Aaron and Rob's confrontation. They fight and Rob shoots Aaron in the face. Next scene. ---- The battle between the Edgelords and the Ultra Singularity rages on, as we get more scenes of shitty dialogue and Primal basically just copying Josuke's "what the hell did you just say about my hair?!" gimmick except a million times dumber. The battle gets interrupted by the arrival of Duncan and the trolls, who themselves are interrupted by the arrival of Ultra, Mig, Yopo, and CaT. During the fight, Mig tries to "ban" Duncan (no idea how the hell that works in this universe), but it doesn't exactly work and Duncan instead strips Mig of his admin abilities, knocking him out cold. Scidra arrives, but not in time to stop Ultra from being really fucking stupid and turning away from THE EVIL GIANT GOD TITAN STANDING RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM. He gets killed from behind, obviously, which is apparently so shocking that it makes CaT gasp twice in a row for some reason. Duncan declares that he's going to crash Chaturn into the main wiki to destroy everything and then teleports himself and his army of trolls away. ---- We see Mig waking up, where it's revealed he can no longer wield his banhammer weapon, and since all the crats are dead, there's no way to restore his rights. The main members of the Ultra Singularity gather around Ultra's corpse and discuss what they're going to do next. They eventually decide to try and reach an agreement with the other factions. CaT finds Rob next to Aaron's corpse and is more than a little peeved at the pointless infighting. Rob proceeds to bail on the Edgelords. I do have to commend the writing team for this extra bit of realism, since Rob bailing on CaT is basically a BTFF tradition at this point. ---- Back with Scidra, Sci is being a useless drama queen, so his underlings decide to step up and help the others. Meanwhile, the main Edgelord crew is meeting with the Brandon, Nick, Thax, Creeper, and the remaining admins. They all agree to work together, and are eventually approached by representatives from Scidra who want to join with them. Creeper starts an argument, and Dyten proceeds to give us one of the worst speeches of all time. *'Dyten:' You do not understand. The battle scars we have, are not ''skin deep. War changes us, and we have to change with it, or '''DIE' and be forgotten among the dust and ashes of the battlefield. We will NOT be honored as heroes. All we ever know, is that we have a cause. It is what makes us who we are. It is what makes us do the things that we do. We are all murderers, but hell, even we were murdered on the inside, when this all began. If you want us to pay, fine, then we will be charged with war crimes. Those who started the war will be charged with war crimes. Hang the leaders if you will, but now is not the time to fight about it. It's incredibly pretentious and boils down to "stfu we're all dicks". Glad we dedicated an entire wall of text to that. Toon steps up and says that after everything is over, the war leaders will be tried by admin law and punished accordingly. Everyone claps for some reason and Reo asks what the plan is. ---- Back with Mig, we see him give the most unintentionally hilarious angsty speech ever written. *'Mig:' Did you ever feel like...? Like all you ever were good at, the whole bro that you are, is gone, and all that's left is... Ashes, dust, nothing important... Just a shell of the bro you were.. Serious angst and the word "bro" just do not mix. Paper gives Mig a bit of a pep talk and then tells Ulti to go find someone. Several hours laters, the group on the battlefield are trying to come up with a plan to get to Chaturn and defeat Duncan. Brandon and Mattimeo come in and report on how the tech development is going, and hand each of the admins an upgraded version of their teleportation machines. Mig's teleporter gets handed to CaT in his absence. The lengths this movie is going to to act like CaT is the main protagonist despite insisting he's not amazes me at times. At sunrise, the admins, CaT, and Reo give a rousing speech to their armies and Toon explains that Yopo, Mig, and Paper are going to the "Wikia Central City", whatever that is, to try and get help. Everyone except for the aforementioned three teleport out of the area to Planet Chaturn, and said aforementioned three promptly teleport to Wikia Central City. ---- So this scene starts out in Wikia Central City of the Wikia Galactic Empire- Okay, so, for some backstory the writers fleshed out but never put into the final film, the whole "Wikia" thing in this universe is apparently a galactic empire where members can colonize new worlds for themselves. Actually, looking at the planning materials, there was a shitton of lore they never put into the movie that would've helped a lot with the whole "world-building" thing. Anyways, Yopo, Mig, and Paper arrive at the city and talk a secretary, where Paper requests an audience with Senator...Brandon Rhea. Yes. Really. That Brandon Rhea. The guy basically in charge of the real-life Wikia community. I can't say I'm surprised, persay, but I am still no less physically cringing out of my chair as I read this scene. Brandon agrees to speak with them, which basically ends the scene. ---- We cut to the middle of the battle between the users and the trolls, where Echo6 and Reo are stuck fighting Ermacpunk and a bunch of Ernief clones (what, no Ude? Color me disappointed). They end up getting overwhelmed by the trolls, and Echo6 sacrifices himself to save Reo. Then the movie ends. I am not fucking kidding. ---- Okay, so, the full ending of the movie was supposed to be released in January, but due to the negative reception the movie got, they decided not to release it. From the planning discussion and pages, it looks like they were considering two different endings. I won't go into detail about either one since they obviously don't want either released to the public, but suffice to say one is actually fairly decent and wraps up one of the character arcs sort of competently. The other one, which looks like the one they were going to end up using, was utter fucking garbage that nullified any and all character arcs the movie had going and sealed the movie as dead in the fucking water when Ulti had me proofread it for typos. It's just. So bad. Of course it was never released so there's no point in harping on it. Time to wrap this shit up. ---- The story sucked. It was miserable to read, it took itself way too seriously, and I gave absolutely zero shits about what was going on. The ending may have cemented this movie as trash, but the preceding portions didn't exactly do it any favors. The only good thing I can say is that some parts felt like they could have worked in a better story, but since this is not a better story, they sort of floundered. Oh, and you know the assassination of Roads? The major event and mystery that kicked off this entire fucking crock of shit? Never explained. At all. The main kickoff for your movie and you never bother to explain who did it and why. Fuck. You. Overall, this section gets a 0.2 out of 3. Characters They're all boring, they're all shit, and they all act like twats. The only semi-likable character was CaT, and that's just because he was less shit than everyone else. He's still only semi-passable though. Before you accuse me of self-nepotism, let me just say that I consider this character to be completely separate from me, because if I was actually like this in real life, I would probably just shoot myself with the goddamn grenade launcher. Overall, this section gets a 0.1/3 Writing The writing is technically legible for the most part, but that's the best I can say about it. There are a few plot holes and inconsistencies (like the Toon thing) that really should have been caught during production, and aside from stuff like that, it can get very awkward and unpleasant to read just on a technical level. A lot of sentences are written awkwardly/pretentiously, and the script format isn't used the best here. Overall, this section gets a 1.3/3 Conclusions Age of Division is quite possibly the biggest flop BTFF has ever seen. It was a big project with bigger aspirations, but the actual execution ended up being a complete mess. I sort of consider it to be The Room of BTFF. It's terrible, but it's so sincere at being terrible that it can end up being kind of hilarious. Because of that and everything else I've mentioned above, the final score for Ben 10 Fan Fiction: Age of Division is ''1.6/10, Anyway, How Is Your Sex Life?''